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MIKE_TV - ☥MΛMΛ☥MIΛ☥


Is there a god? Does he usually send angels down upon earth? All of these questions and more are answered in the album of the century, ☥MΛMΛ☥MIΛ☥. When god does touch the earth, there is one particular thing he does not touch, that is the Super Mario Brothers. But there is one who is willing to alter the meaning of existence. His name is MIKE_TV and he is not afraid to alter your perception of time and space.
Are you ready? I don't think you are. This album will scramble your very existence as you begin to question your being. Who am I? Why do I exist? 
This album turns Super Mario into a dark abyss that nobody can get out. I fall so hard that I forgot that I had fallen. I accept the fact that the rest of my life is going to be riddled in static. Then it stops and the album is over. Suddenly I open my eyes and colors appear more vibrant. Whoa. 
An album as dark as this demands an appropriate environment. All lights out. Nothing else to distract you. This album will make you kick. This album will make you scream. ☥MΛMΛ☥MIΛ☥ alters perception in a way that sends the listener in a different universe.
So if you're looking to be possessed by satan for 22 minutes, this is the album.

10/10
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Tonight I Will Review My Parents

My parents are pretty cool. My mom's name is Cosmia, and my dad's name is Mike. They have a good taste in music so that's good, but they're really dysfunctional. My mom claims that my dad isn't my real dad, but I still think he is. She also claims I was born in a lab in a test tube. Sometimes she gets these mood swings where she calls me a bitch and then proceeds to say she loves me. My dad on the other hand is always high. He's not very nice to my mom either. He keeps asking her to ride his "Flesh Canoe", and I have no idea what that means, but it sounds pretty gross. He's also a musician and he writes these pieces with a lot of harsh noise that piss off my mom. He also constantly asks her to get plastic surgery so she can look like one of those K-Pop singers. It turns out my real dad is Lil B, so does that mean I'm the Based Jesus?

Overall, my parents have excellent taste in music, and watching them fight all the time is good entertainment.

10.0/10
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Milo - Things That Happen at Day/Night


Milo - Things that Happen at Day/Night (2013)
Conscious Rap / Experimental Hip Hop / Spoken Word

This double-EP has been my rap AOTY so far. People who know more of the sub-genre have told me Milo's brand of "conscious rap" isn't the typical message-y criticism of mainstream rap as others are, allegedly. Either way, Milo's style is distinctly stream-of-consciousness and often integrates spoken-word/poetry, which he has perfected in this album (featuring original production by Analog(ue) Tape Dispenser, whereas his earlier albums were mixtapes including Shlohmo and Gold Panda). Combine it with his internet-childhood and starry-eyed philosophy major persona, the whole package makes for a refreshing, personal voice to the rap.

Duality is a major theme in this work. Some tracks have two parts a la Shabazz Palaces - Black Up. In style, the two EPs are produced by different people and convey opposing tones and atmospheres. The Day EP is brighter, hopeful, and upbeat while Night is atmospheric, aloof, and somber. In content, the Day's lyrics are full of hopes and nostalgia and even the pessimistic repetition in "folk-metaphysics" is positive in its sense of determination. Night's lyrics are more abstract and illogical, full of philosophical skepticism and self-pessimism. Personally, I enjoy listening to the Night half more, the production just seems to respond with Milo's rapping much better, especially in "a lazy coon's ober dictum" and "post hoc ergo propter hoc (for Schopenhaeur)." But, that doesn't mean much when listening to both EP's adds far more to the experience.

Listen Here/Reviews/Interviews:
http://hellfyreclub.bandcamp.com/album/things-that-happen-at-night
http://miloraps.bandcamp.com/
Milo - Things That Happen At Day / Things That Happen At Night EP REVIEW
Interview w/ Milo
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Gillian Welch - Time (The Revelator)


Gillian Welch - Time (The Revelator)
2001
Bluegrass / Americana / Female Vocalist

For those who believe that bluegrass necessarily involves the coal choked bellowing of superannuated hillbillies accompanied by frenetic banjo pluckings and screeching fiddles, Gillian Welch's songs may come as surprise.  That's because these dusky Appalachian ballads delight in simplicity and unfold in a leisurely walk.  The intricate instrumentation of more uptempo bluegrass has been jettisoned in favor of clean melodies played on Clawhammer banjo and acoustic guitar, the sole instruments featured on the album.   Gillian's honeyed voice makes up for this lack of musical variation, however, and keeps the tracks from sounding too spartan.

The album opens with the title track, a dissonant and melancholy song about betrayal that packs an emotional punch despite it's languid pace.  While this track sets the tone for the rest of the album, not all the songs that follow are despondent strum und drang pieces.  The lilting "Red Clay Halo" makes for a playful break into sunshine while the bluesy "My First Lover" tips its hat to black spirituals.  Another stand out is "Dear Someone" (Sample 2), a wistful lullaby about the desire to be swept away by dreams of love.  However, these are exceptions to the rule as Gillian seems more comfortable working in minor key solemnity.  A case in point is the penultimate track "Everything is Free," an austere, elegiac song whose unrelieved sadness does get a bit cloying.

Then there is the last track, the epic "I Dream a Highway" (Sample 1).  Like the rest of the album the song is simple, maintaining a 4 measure melody (with slight variation) for all of it's 14 minutes.  Here the guitar remains understated and the entirety of the track is carried by Gillian's haunted vocals.  It is easily the best song on the album and, in fact, would threaten to overshadow the other tracks were they of lesser quality.  As it stands, it is a perfect closer for an collection of slow and enchanting -- one might even say mystical -- bluegrass that rounds out the sometimes stilted picture that people have of Appalachian music.

Samples:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jvREUDH2BZ0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_SbWzbjueQ
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i smoked some weed around 3:30 oclock. at first i smoked my weed out of my weed bong. it was some good shit. makes you huigh wile gettomg even higher. good stuff. then my friend whips out his shit. its purp af and looks dank as fuck. he packs the bowl and i take a big hit, mixing the weed smoke in my weed lungs. it made me get really hyper, but no crazy weed effects.

id give my weed an 8/10 and his weed a 6/10, needs to improve

pic is the weed
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Spanish Air - Spanish Air


Unfortunately for Spanish Air, I did not ignore his Bandcamp page. Fortunately, I am pleased to say that this album is great! You hear that Anonymous, I liked your debut album!!!!
Post Rock and Ambient seem to go hand in hand. Most of the time, it is artists who are naturally Post Rock who are the ones reaching for the ambient. Here, a very young Anonymous, a naturally talented ambient artist, reaches for Post Rock. It's dangerous territory! Thankfully, he does not stumble.
As far as Bandcamp albums go, this is top shelf. When we are talking about where this ranks in the black reaches of ambient Bandcamp, it falls short of A Decent Man. Of course, that is too be expected. Spanish Air simply accomplishes his goal of creating an enjoyable ambient album.
Hi five Anonymous! You are worldwide famous now!

7/10
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Purity Ring (and Blue Hawaii): 2013 Concert Review Review


Cosmia wants me to review her review. It is a very great review. I almost fainted because I was so stunned by the perfection of the review. I had no idea she saw Blue Hawaii too. I like them. They sound a lot like Grimes.
Good job Cosmia.

∞/10
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The Colors

Today I will review the colors of the rainbow. I'll go by the standard ROYGBIV.

Red:: This color is alright. Its pretty powerful, but is also the color of things like blood, which can make people feel queasy.
ORANGE: This color is easily one of the top colors of the rainbow. Nothing rhymes with it, which is pretty cool. The color they have for the highlight doesnt do it justice though. A bright orange is very pleasing to look at, and is a prety exotic color. Not many natural things have the color orange.
YELLOW:: Yellow is a good, but also bad color. Certain shades of the rainbow are cool to look at, but some shades can hurt your eyes or can just be annoying. Yellow is also a very hard thing to read if it's used for writing, which is also no good. Overall yellow has its drawbacks, but can be great.
green: Green is a great color. It's a color that symbolizes nature, and being good for the environment. It's a color that can also have a second meaning, like "going green", and also things can be described as "green" which is always a good thing, because it means it's good for the environment. Other than that, Green also has the most discernible shades out of any other color, which is why night vision goggles are all in green. So not only does the color green carry other meanings which always describe things positively, it also has a very practical use in our life.
Blue:: Blue is a very cool color, and is usually seen as being cold. Blue is also the color we probably see the most, because our sky is blue. Many people confuse Blue with Indigo because they are very similar, but I think blue is the superior color because its very pleasing to look at, especially if its the same shade as the sky.
INDIGO:The fact that so many books still name Indigo "the greatest or most significant or most influential" color ever only tells you how far the rainbow still is from becoming a serious art. Primary color critics have long recognized that the greatest primary colors of all time are Blue and Red which were not the most vibrant or smooth or bold of their times, let alone of all times. Secondary critics rank the highly controversial Orange over other colors which were highly popular in art around Europe. Tertiary critics are still blinded by commercial success: Indigo sold more than any others (not true, by the way), therefore it must have been the greatest. Primary critics grow up looking at a lot of colors of the past, Secondary critics grow up looking at a lot of colors of the past. Tertiary critics are often totally ignorant of the colors of the past, they barely know the best sellers. No wonder they will think that Indigo created anything worth of being saved.
Violet yo shout out to violet

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fourwallsandaroof Review

fourwallsandaroof is probably the best room on turntable.fm entire site. The owner (faded) is pretty cool, but he can't into AnCo so he is suck. :P spooky is a qt, and he likes AncO so he is cool. QuincyJones420MD is a nice guy, but he can't into aNcO so he is pleb. Jung Manhater is one of my favorite users, and he likes AC Collective except Peacebone, so he's alright. wildCosmia is cool, but she can't into hip-hop so I question her sanity, but at least she likes Avey Tare and the Animals. Benway is nice, and he likes DEAK so he is kewl. Nubbin is based as fuck, but he can't into Animals Collection so he's a little weird. MIKE_TV 420 is my favorite user because the only artist in his list of favorites is AC, so he is super patrish. The other people that go here are alright. As for the music that gets played, it's pretty good. I think the only time I didn't bop is when somebody played Skrillex, so there you go. The rules are pretty good, except the no songs under 10 minutes rule, because sometimes I want to troll. This is a really good room and you should visit it at least once a day, if you don't you are suck.

The room gets a 7.4/10.
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4356 Rival rice cooker/steamer



The doorbell rings. (ding-a-ling!)

Cars fly by my street as I open the front door to receive my package. I wonder how many children have been slaughtered by drivers. I have never been in a car accident. Phillip, the deliveryman from UPS, hands me an electronic screen to sign. Its so incredible how we have moved so far as a country but have we moved at all? I sign it with a flourish. He gives me a longing stare and shuffles off.

 It has arrived. It is here.

My model 4356 Rival rice cooker/steamer has come in the mail.



Unfortunately, that was full of shit and i'm full of shit. Four Walls Music Reviews has asked to review some appliances. I don't have any new ones so I had to review this rice cooker.

I do not ever remember living without this rice cooker. My family has had it for so long.

So lets get started! I have this great 4356 Rival rice cooker/steamer and i'm dropping acid. The  4356 Rival rice cooker/steamer is great for making basmati rice. Basmati is a variety of rice grown primarily in Pakistan and India. It tastes much better than standard American rice.

 I think the cooker requires 5 1/2 cups of water and 2 cups of rice but don't hold me 2 it. Add a pinch of salt. Press the button, set the shit, wait an hour. You should now have fantastic rice cooked al dente.

Damn im really trippin out right now. Hahaha. 

This might be a really old rice cooker, but it makes some great rice. And it had got that vintage look. 

7.5/10

What is it like to be a rice cooker?

look at that fortune cookie!!!



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Purity Ring (and Blue Hawaii): 2013 Concert


5/4 Crofoot Ballroom Pontiac, Mi

Last night I saw Purity Ring live and I'm still glowing from it, I'm in such a good mood just because it was such a great concert, I'm really glad I got to be there!
I haven't listened to them all that much, to be honest. I downloaded the album about two months ago and listened to it passively. Then Coachella rolled around, and I wasn't there, but I caught their performance live on YouTube and it was really interesting to me! all the fog, those fancy-shmancy lights that guy had that he was PLAYING with drumsticks! Anyways, I checked to see if they were going to come around here anytime soon and they were going to be in MI in just a couple weeks time. I quickly bought tickets and listened to Shrines a couple more times. I just liked how catchy the songs are, and I knew the concert would be a lot of fun. Fast forward a couple days before the concert to where I've listened to the album a couple more times, and I had been reading the lyrics and I realized they're not just a quirky experimental band whose music is just very dance-able  There's something dark and twisted in the lyrics, they're haunting at times. They seem romantic but they put what they're saying into such strange phraseology (example: Fineshrine). And I've come to realize that there's more to them than what I heard on my first listen. The dance-able poppy element never goes away, even when engaging in listening to the lyrics.

I was a bit unmoved by Blue Hawaii, they had their moments during the brief set. They played four or five songs. It wasn't bad but it wasn't as an unforgettable show. I found myself swaying a little the whole time. Raph Standell-Preston and Alexander Cowan are obviously passionate and attached to the music they make-- as seen by the way Alexander was doing his lil' jigs to the music and how Raph was almost jumping into the notes she was hitting. I can't say I'd go out of my way to see Blue Hawaii again.

Finally Purity Ring comes on after a well anticipated wait. They get on stage and Corin Roddick unveils his set up. The touch-sensitive lights he plays with drumsticks are really. The lights on stage and the fog that set in made the aurora amazing. The lights made the show really interesting, its not like they were just cool effects added to make it a little more razzle-dazzle. The lights and fog added to every song's individuality and the album as a whole.

Purity Ring was amazing to see live, it was unlike any other concert I've ever been to so far. They have a lot of offer and I can't wait to hear more, in the meantime I'll be analyzing the one album they have out currently, I'd really like to know what sort of theme(s) run through it. It's a really unique album that doesn't seem like too much weight to it at first, but when you realize they constantly mention ribcages, organs and the anatomy to say what they're trying to say; it pulls you in.


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Yeasayer - Odd Blood Review


Yeasayer is an interesting band. They sound like Animal Collective had sex with 80s Synthpop to me, and this is not a bad thing. Odd Blood is one of those albums that tries to sound completely different for each track, and it pulls this off well in some parts.
Track 1: The Children
This is a very unsettling track, that features a slow, driving beat, and vocals that were put through a fan and then pitch corrected, adding to the creepy vibe of this track.
Track 2: Ambling Alp
This is probably my favorite track on this album. It has beautiful instrumentation, a great melody, and some feely lyrics. Sure, it's the single, but it's a fantastic single.
Track 3: Madder Red
This track is great too. It has that late 80s vibe to it, and it has wonderful instrumentation. This is one of the album's highlights.
Track 4: I Remember
The synthesizers on this track are pretty cool, but the rest of it is kinda generic.
Track 5: O.N.E.
This track has more great instrumentation, and continues with that 80s vibe. It's very upbeat, I'd say it's a good song for parties.
Track 6: Love Me Girl
This track isn't that good. It just sounds bland to me. I really don't have much to say about this track.
Track 7: Rome
This track is pretty good. It's got a good beat, and good instrumentation, but it can get a little repetitive.
Track 8: Strange Reunions
The odd time signatures are really cool, but the song itself is just poor.
Track 9: Mondegreen
This track is pretty cool, but the lyrics are kinda disturbing.
Track 10: Grizelda
This track is a good closer, and has some good harmonies, but the vocals don't really match the song that well.

Overall, this album has some fantastic instrumentation, each track sounds different, and has a great vibe to it, but half of the tracks just feel generic and just seem like filler.

6.8/10.
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Radiohead - Kid A


I had never even seen a shooting star before. 25 years of rotations, passes through comets' paths, and travel, and to my memory I had never witnessed burning debris scratch across the night sky. Radiohead were hunched over their instruments. Thom Yorke slowly beat on a grand piano, singing, eyes closed, into his microphone like he was trying to kiss around a big nose. Colin Greenwood tapped patiently on a double bass, waiting for his cue. White pearls of arena light swam over their faces. A lazy disco light spilled artificial constellations inside the aluminum cove of the makeshift stage. The metal skeleton of the stage ate one end of Florence's Piazza Santa Croce, on the steps of the Santa Croce Cathedral. Michelangelo's bones and cobblestone laid beneath. I stared entranced, soaking in Radiohead's new material, chiseling each sound into the best functioning parts of my brain which would be the only sound system for the material for months.
The butterscotch lamps along the walls of the tight city square bled upward into the cobalt sky, which seemed as strikingly artificial and perfect as a wizard's cap. The staccato piano chords ascended repeatedly. "Black eyed angels swam at me," Yorke sang like his dying words. "There was nothing to fear, nothing to hide." The trained critical part of me marked the similarity to Coltrane's "Ole." The human part of me wept in awe.
The Italians surrounding me held their breath in communion (save for the drunken few shouting "Criep!"). Suddenly, a rise of whistles and orgasmic cries swept unfittingly through the crowd. The song, "Egyptian Song," was certainly momentous, but wasn't the response more apt for, well, "Creep?" I looked up. I thought it was fireworks. A teardrop of fire shot from space and disappeared behind the church where the syrupy River Arno crawled. Radiohead had the heavens on their side.
For further testament, Chip Chanko and I both suffered auto-debilitating accidents in the same week, in different parts of the country, while blasting "Airbag" in our respective Japanese imports. For months, I feared playing the song about car crashes in my car, just as I'd feared passing 18- wheelers after nearly being crushed by one in 1990. With good reason, I suspect Radiohead to possess incomprehensible powers. The evidence is only compounded with Kid A-- the rubber match in the band's legacy-- an album which completely obliterates how albums, and Radiohead themselves, will be considered.
Even the heralded OK Computer has been nudged down one spot in Valhalla. Kid A makes rock and roll childish. Considerations on its merits as "rock" (i.e. its radio fodder potential, its guitar riffs, and its hooks) are pointless. Comparing this to other albums is like comparing an aquarium to blue construction paper. And not because it's jazz or fusion or ambient or electronic. Classifications don't come to mind once deep inside this expansive, hypnotic world. Ransom, the philologist hero of C.S. Lewis' Out of the Silent Planet who is kidnapped and taken to another planet, initially finds his scholarship useless in his new surroundings, and just tries to survive the beautiful new world.
This is an emotional, psychological experience. Kid A sounds like a clouded brain trying to recall an alien abduction. It's the sound of a band, and its leader, losing faith in themselves, destroying themselves, and subsequently rebuilding a perfect entity. In other words, Radiohead hated being Radiohead, but ended up with the most ideal, natural Radiohead record yet.
"Everything in Its Right Place" opens like Close Encounters spaceships communicating with pipe organs. As your ears decide whether the tones are coming or going, Thom Yorke's Cuisinarted voice struggles for its tongue. "Everything," Yorke belts in uplifting sighs. The first-person mantra of "There are two colors in my head" is repeated until the line between Yorke's mind and the listener's mind is erased.
Skittering toy boxes open the album's title song, which, like the track "Idioteque," shows a heavy Warp Records influence. The vocoder lullaby lulls you deceivingly before the riotous "National Anthem." Mean, fuzzy bass shapes the spine as unnerving theremin choirs limn. Brash brass bursts from above like Terry Gilliam's animated foot. The horns swarm as Yorke screams, begs, "Turn it off!" It's the album's shrill peak, but just one of the incessant goosebumps raisers.
After the rockets exhaust, Radiohead float in their lone orbit. "How to Disappear Completely" boils down "Let Down" and "Karma Police" to their spectral essence. The string-laden ballad comes closest to bridging Yorke's lyrical sentiment to the instrumental effect. "I float down the Liffey/ I'm not here/ This isn't happening," he sings in his trademark falsetto. The strings melt and weep as the album shifts into its underwater mode. "Treefingers," an ambient soundscape similar in sound and intent to Side B of Bowie and Eno's Low, calms after the record's emotionally strenuous first half.
The primal, brooding guitar attack of "Optimistic" stomps like mating Tyrannosaurs. The lyrics seemingly taunt, "Try the best you can/ Try the best you can," before revealing the more resigned sentiment, "The best you can is good enough." For an album reportedly "lacking" in traditional Radiohead moments, this is the best summation of their former strengths. The track erodes into a light jam before morphing into "In Limbo." "I'm lost at sea," Yorke cries over clean, uneasy arpeggios. The ending flares with tractor beams as Yorke is vacuumed into nothingness. The aforementioned "Idioteque" clicks and thuds like Aphex Twin and Bjork's Homogenic, revealing brilliant new frontiers for the "band." For all the noise to this point, it's uncertain entirely who or what has created the music. There are rarely traditional arrangements in the ambiguous origin. This is part of the unique thrill of experiencing Kid A.
Pulsing organs and a stuttering snare delicately propel "Morning Bell." Yorke's breath can be heard frosting over the rainy, gray jam. Words accumulate and stick in his mouth like eye crust. "Walking walking walking walking," he mumbles while Jonny Greenwood squirts whale-chant feedback from his guitar. The closing "Motion Picture Soundtrack" brings to mind The White Album, as it somehow combines the sentiment of Lennon's LP1 closer-- the ode to his dead mother, "Julia"-- with Ringo and Paul's maudlin, yet sincere LP2 finale, "Goodnight." Pump organ and harp flutter as Yorke condones with affection, "I think you're crazy." To further emphasize your feeling at that moment and the album's overall theme, Yorke bows out with "I will see you in the next life." If you're not already there with him.
The experience and emotions tied to listening to Kid A are like witnessing the stillborn birth of a child while simultaneously having the opportunity to see her play in the afterlife on Imax. It's an album of sparking paradox. It's cacophonous yet tranquil, experimental yet familiar, foreign yet womb-like, spacious yet visceral, textured yet vaporous, awakening yet dreamlike, infinite yet 48 minutes. It will cleanse your brain of those little crustaceans of worries and inferior albums clinging inside the fold of your gray matter. The harrowing sounds hit from unseen angles and emanate with inhuman genesis. When the headphones peel off, and it occurs that six men (Nigel Godrich included) created this, it's clear that Radiohead must be the greatest band alive, if not the best since you know who. Breathing people made this record! And you can't wait to dive back in and try to prove that wrong over and over.
10/10
-pie
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Jenny Hval - Innocence Is Kinky


Has she did with her 2011 album, Viscera, Jenny Hval begins her latest album, Innocence is Kinky, with a sexual confession. With Viscera, she describes pressing an electric toothbrush to her clitoris. Innocence is Kinky begins with an ode to pornography. The similarities don't stop there.
Viscera went virtually unnoticed by the American music press when it was released in 2011. Going back, Viscera was one of the best albums of 2011. It is going to be hard to follow it up. Pitchfork has taken notice and a Best New Music is inevitable. However, being that they completely ignored Viscera, they can go fuck themselves.
"Innocence is just too kinky, isn't it?"
This line comes with Jenny's love of virgins. Okay. That should not come as unexpected. Jenny loves throwing off the listener with strongly compelling lines, as if forcing the listener to pay attention. It works. There are a lot of spoken word segments throughout the album, one of the strangest of which being in "Give Me That Sound". Jenny's songwriting is downright weird. Most of the time, her spoken word segments can be cheesy. It would be a lot better if the songs were without them.
As with Viscera, this album demands multiple listens. This album can only grow more compelling after the first listen. No matter how strange her spoken word segments may be, her actual songs stand out as exceptional. "I Got No Strings" is an outstanding movement. I use the term movement because that is the most accurate way to describe them. Jenny combines pop sensibilities with the experimentation that comes with her exuberant personality.
When comparing this to Viscera, it does not quite match up. Her spoken word segments prevents this album from becoming truly something special. However, this album has enough compelling songs to warrant multiple listens. Now go watch Pitchfork praise it.

7.5/10

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Deer Tick - War Elephant
2007
>Alt-Country, Indie Rock

Young performers have a hard time making it in the hard-scrabble, boot-strappy world of alternative country because of the emphasis that the genres places on the quality of "authenticity."  One not only has to have an "authentic" sound, but to have an "authentic" lifestyle as well including, if possible, an impoverished upbringing in a rural setting, a long string of bad relationships, budding alcoholism or drug addiction and, of course, an unquenchable hatred of all things Nashville.  Whether or not lead singer John McCauley has been able to live up to these high standards of low living in his short 21 years on this earth remains debatable -- and ultimately beside the point.  The sound that he's managed to cobble together out of equal parts country and indie rock should be enough, regardless of the fact that he hails from Rhode Island.

The songs themselves don't reach back very far into the alt-country music tradition, eschewing the likes of Townes Van Zandt, and Steve Earle and drawing more from relative newcomers like Uncle Tupelo.  They are, however, firmly rooted in the punk / indie sound that was established in the early 90's as being what alt-country was ostensibly all about.  In fact, on many tracks, particularly "Baltimore Blues No. 1" and the rageful "Not So Dense," they betray a striking resemblance to indie bands such as Modest Mouse and Bright Eyes.

Nevertheless, there does remain something disingenuous about some of DT's songs, particularly the more ballad-like, and sorrowful arrangements.  At times they sound as if they're reaching for more psychological weight than their songs will reasonably bear, inviting detractors to label DT as "try-hards," or, indeed, "inauthentic."  Also, when McCauley's voice reaches into the higher registers it tends to get a bit nasal, which can be grating.

Overall, the War Elephant is a solid first effort by a group of musicians who are indeed young, inexperienced and yet eminently talented.

Samples:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1pT1ZjAFXs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0kuoaSOAmQ

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Animal Collective - Honeycomb / Gotham Review


Animal Collective released a 45 RPM single with two original songs. I will be reviewing the two tracks.
Track 1: Honeycomb.
This track starts great, the verses are amazing, the choruses are beautiful, this whole song is perfect. It's hyper, it's energetic, it's like you got high on honey.
Track 2: Gotham.
This is the the exact opposite of Honeycomb. It's very slow and calm. It's almost sad.

That's my half-assed review of this little gem. I highly recommend checking out both tracks.
9.7/10.
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Shackleton - Music for the Quiet Hour / The Drawbar Organ EPs




Shackleton - Music for the Quiet Hour / The Drawbar Organ EPs
2012
>Ambient Dub, Experimental, Spoken Word

People often associate ambient music with soaring synthed female vocals, gossamer textures, and smooth rivers of bass with perhaps some measured silences thrown in.  Shackleton's ambient dub takes a different tack, though.  Because it builds it's songs on a backbone of tribal and African beats the music stays thoroughly terrestrial.  The expansive "soundscape" that one expects from the likes of more traditional ambient artists becomes much more claustrophobic and menacing.  There's also a prominent Middle Eastern sound to many of the songs as followers of Shackleton's Muslimgauze influenced releases on Skull Disco will be quick to point out.

If The Drawbar Organ's more dub inspired works can seem a bit baleful at times, then music for the quiet hour is downright apocalyptic -- literally.  The album culminates in a 21 minute ambient cum spoken word piece narrated by a Patrick Bateman sound-a-like as he dictates a letter to his future grandson who has traveled back in time to warn him of impending calamity.  It's more meditative than urgent in tone since the catastrophe is inescapable, but it's impact is no less powerful for that.

While the two EPs may not appeal to those accustomed to more traditional EDM, it's definitely worth a listen if you enjoy more experimental compositions.

Samples:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gt_SThAgLPk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b92UZgbdqRg

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The Boondiggas - Sexy


Sometimes, I take walks to solve my boredom. My usual routine consists of walking to the opposite side of campus then back. The last building on campus is the music building. As I was approaching the building, I heard live music. It was coming from the bar across the street. I might as well check it out. What I heard was a band called The Boondiggas, who's set consisted of a Funk Rock hybrid. It is a bit strange sitting in a bar by myself, but I was liking what I was seeing. As time went on, hoards of drunk people took to the open space to dance and have a good time. Me, being, completely sober, was not particularly keen to dancing at the moment. Believe me though, this music was danceable.
One of their representatives gave me their business card with all of their info on it. Okay. Seeing that this blog is now a world famous fortess of knowledge that makes Piero Scaruffi jealous, I might as well review their latest album, Sexy, released in 2012.
Getting straight to the point, the guys sound like their having fun. Their clear objective is to make danceable music. Most of the time, it's through funk jams that would suit any bar just fine. When they are feeling particularly saucy, they touch on their reggae side, which seems groovy enough.
This brings me to my second point: The songs on this album are nothing more then jams to show off the musician's knowledge of the blues scale. They do just fine with that. If you come in looking for great songwriting, this isn't the place to look.
This is just fine. I like jams. I think they are fun. That being said, it would be nice if the guitarist were to... stop. What better way to play funk then chopping up chords? Right? Right? Well... While the rest of the band marches off with the terrific horn section, the rhythm section stays with the rhythm section. It is pretty easy to tell that these guys all just came from jazz ensamble class. It feels constrained. When I want funk, I want some pentatonic fills every few bars.
Also, the lead singer wears a fedora.

4/10

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My Mom's Spaghetti and Meatballs!


If you think of "Mom's Spaghetti" you probably think "God, I bet it tastes delicious like my mom's spaghetti!".  Well you're wrong.  My mom's spaghetti is terrible.  First of all, she purchases the cheapest noodles, sauce, and only uses salt and pepper for spice.  Where's the parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme?  It's still at the damned store, that's where it's at!

Here's the recipe.

1.  Make sure to put the noodles in the water before it starts boiling so it all sticks together and gets all shitty.

2.  Put the tomato sauce in a separate bowl but don't add any spices or heat it up or anything.  That's too much work.

3.  Get a pound of hamburger meat.  Don't buy any breadcrumbs or anything to make the meatballs with.  Here's what you do.  You take a bowl, put water in it.  put some bread in it (yeah bread).  soak the bread in the water for five minutes, then get all the excess water off of it.  Put the moist bread into a bowl with two eggs and a cup of Parmesan cheese.  Mix all of that shit together until you have a sticky mess of meat that you'll brown in a skillet to make these shitty meat balls that won't stay round.  They'll turn out like little meatloaf hamburger patty things.

4.  after the noodles are overcooked but still all stuck together, drain the water but not all of it.  put the sauce inside the pot with the noodles then dump the meatballs inside of it.

5.  stir all of that together and serve.

Taste: 4/10  the meatballs taste okay but they have a really weird texture.  It's kind of exotic. The spaghetti itself is really bland.

Effort: 4/10 Buying all the cheapest ingredients here is crucial.  Make sure not to use any good spices either.

Aesthetic Value:  8/10  it pretty much still looks like spaghetti and meatballs on the surface.



*Pro-tip:  If at all possible ask her if she can make "GREEN SPAGHETTI" instead.  That shit is bomb.  it's like pesto or something.  It's amazingly good.
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EPIC REVEIW BY THE BEST OF ALL TIME
please play music as you read this reveiw
this reveiw is done live during a listenthrough

01 <3 & Luck
wow can I start off by saying how annoying it is to write that title. it takes me way too long and requires too much effort on my part. I think Collaptic should change it to something that makes more sense, like maybe heart and luck. you see that requires a lot less of me pressing the shift key, and that makes me happy. songs pretty cool too
02 Mind Vassal
this song is good when it opens. It reminds me of something on a beach. Lots of clapping, snares, and snaps to remind me where I am though, which is good because I can't go floating off somewhere finding shells. The vocals sound good I wonder who did them, is it collaptic himself? i think its sampled actully idunno. It said california though which is where i live. stoked on that.
03 Reel #4
This one starts out really mellow. It feels like flaoting somewhere. Maybe in the ocean, with jsut enough sunlight breaking through to create some sparkles. then its more like in the air. I'm like flying or something. really not enough guitar or vocal grunts though. would enjoy some references to satan or something imo
04 Summer
Well this is a graet song to reveiw right now becasue it's like almost summer or something. it damn well feels like it, its like 80 something degrees and im sweating my fdick off. lemme go get some juice ill brb guys.
This juice is wonderful, probably the best juice I've ever dank. It's fresh and cold, straight out of the refrigerator which gives it a refreshing feeling as you drink it. The first sip takes you away, The orange tartness immediately hits you followed by fructose concentrate dreams. It goes down easy, piratically sliding down your throat like a dick down mikes. It tastes even fresher then how delicious it is. I can ahrdly tell its been sealed for a few weeks, and shipped from mexico or something. They doo good with the preservatives to sustain the quality, and decadence you deserve when relaxing with a nice, cool glass of juice. The design of the carton isn't that bad either. It's orange, which perfectly outlines the fact that it's orange juice. It has vines, and even little oranges. Its well designed and very clean, which is good because some people could see that in the store and decide right then and there to buy it.

Overall, this juice was a delight with some new-wave inspired roots, and im excited to taste Trader Joe's next release.

9/10 


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4wallsreveiws.collaptic.com review review

This review is bad the score doesn't jive with the review

The picture was descriptive tho

10/9
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Animal Collective - Centipede Hz Album Review


Animal Collective's latest release is a hard nut to crack. It's full of white noise and radio static, keyboards buzzing around, and Avey Tare screaming (of course).
Track 1: Moonjock.
This is a prefect opener to the album, the radio announcement in the beginning already shows what the album is going to sound like. Avey and Panda's harmonies soar, although not as good as on Merriweather, but still good.
Track 2: Today's Supernatural.
"COME ON LELELELELELELELELET GO!" Avey shouts in this frenetic track. The Organ sounds like a carousel that has gone out of control, as discordant sound effects buzz around in the background.
Track 3: Rosie Oh.
One of Panda Bear's tracks on this album, it has even more sound effects and stuff. The melodies and harmonies seem buried underneath the sound effects, but it adds a nice touch.
Track 4: Applesauce.
This is probably one of the most complex tracks on the album, it is constantly changing time signatures and tempos, and the lyrics are very poetic. This is where the album starts to calm down and show you enjoy what it really has to offer.
Track 5: Wide Eyed.
This sequencer based jam is Deakin's song, and it's very catchy. It's been stuck in my head ever since I first heard it, and it never gets old.
Track 6: Father Time.
This is one of the weaker tracks on the album, but it's still very good. I honestly don't have that much to say about it.
Track 7: New Town Burnout.
Panda's other track on this album, and it really shines. After the previous hyperactive tracks on the album, this track is there to get you to relax and prepare you for the second half of the album. The vocal harmonies and mellow synths are very refreshing to hear.
Track 8: Monkey Riches.
Another hyper track, this one is constantly bouncing around, like a monkey. Avey Tare is screaming his head off in this track, which is slightly humorous.
Track 9: Mercury Man.
This is the only track on the album that I really can't get into. Sure, the King Tubby sample is pretty cool, but it's just a lackluster breakup song.
Track 10: Pulleys.
This song is alright. I wish the synth melody was louder. That's about it.
Track 11: Amanita.
This is a perfect closer to the album, the tone of the synth, the tribal drums, and the lyrics are some of the best on the album. The second half of the track is just pure bliss.

Overall, this is a wonderful album. It's hard to get into, but once you finally get it, it will stay with you forever.
I give this album a 9.5/10.
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My Dog


He is very cute but sometimes he can be annoying. He'll jump up all on me when he wants to go outside and it's just like, chill out man, Jesus. He also sheds like a motherfucker; I could make a beard out of this little shit's daily hair yield (DHY). And to top it all off a few months ago he pulled his leg running after a cat and he's been hobbling ever since. Now I have a gimp for a dog. Thanks, Obama.

Final verdict: 6.7/10
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this drake song im listening to


starting from the bottom say i never write a review nigga? hahahah just kidding but seriously - drake. hes a hottie boddie (id let him murder my vagina)( hes got a voice like a lil puppy you just want to hit with a frying pan,, but you just cant stop listyning to. take care you might say to that puppy as some form of twisted irony. gross.,, anyway give hima  try! people give him shit but he really can have some flow
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Today I Will Review Nutella


Hello I Eat nutella and it is very good i highly recommend it. its very yummy. its good on toast and you can eat it on a orange its very good

NUTELLA 

SOLID 10
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4wallsreveiws.collaptic.com

Today i'm doing a reveiw on this website called fourwallreveiws.collaptic.com. I went there, and let me tell you it's a pile of shit. Its a bunch of lunatics writing the worst nonsense i've ever had the displeasure to read, and I needed at least 3 tylenols to get thourgh all the reveiws becasue of the headaches I got. Dont go here, it fucking sucks.

this is how i felt when i first visited this website
10/10
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my bong


i will review my bong its a very tall bong about 3 feet high and it can be filled with water and a marijuana plant and the fire is supereffective on the marijuana plant and a defense mechanism of the marijauana plant is to release toxic fumes which the bong collects and stores in my body

wahats special about the bong: my bong has influences from 70s bongs and 80s bongs and 60s psychedelic bongs. its slighgtly experiemental in composition because of its height. its the equivalent of watching a stillborn birth get high as fuck.
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Mike tv 420's Music Taste


I mean he likes things like animal collective and some weaaboo japan pop shit so i guess its okay alright. his music is pretty good okay or bad maybe. wheverver i lsiten to it its like babys on acid hitting a xylophone idk maybe. so my reveiw of mike's muhe likes alot of animal collective hich is inice but really sometimes he jsut needs to paly less of it or more of it or the saem amount okay.

id give this a bad or good or a great rating maybe idk/10
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3ds REVIEW


3ds : 3d or just a fake!


The 3ds was fun! but it hurt my eyes. My mother only bought me one game for it so ill have to only review that game. The name of the game was the ocarina of Time!

It was very reminiscent

The game was fun except for the water temple. I had to go on ign and look up a walkthrough lol.

The graphics are really realistic. But the 3d hurts my eyes

The battery life is pretty good.



Thanks for listening!!!

Visuals: 10/10
Sound 5/10 (not loud enough)
Looks 9/10 (GOOD)

total: 10/10

-Pie
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